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Sharing with the Gazette, Ronald Ferguson, an economist who trained at MIT and has taught for more than three decades at Harvard, shared about the styles of raising successful children. His sharing was also published in the book “Recipe: Unlocking the Secret to Raising Successful Children”. Educators have called it one of the most comprehensive studies on parenting.
During the study, Professor Ronald Ferguson’s team gathered the experiences of many parents about what they did, the intentions they intended to do, and what prompted them to have these intentions. there. He also talked openly with their children to get a better understanding.
The “recipe” for raising successful children that Professor Ronald Ferguson revealed includes eight important roles of parents.
8 roles parents need to do to raise successful kids
First, early learning partner
Parents need to arouse children’s interest in learning as early as possible, especially before children start school. Most of the successful kids he interviews can read basic words by the time they start kindergarten. Some have shared that they feel more interested in learning thanks to the feeling of “leading”, when teachers excitedly praise them for being able to read early and understand lessons quickly.
Second and third, make sure the world treats you right and “correct” if something goes wrong
Parents should take the time to pay attention to what their child is receiving from school. If the necessary values are not guaranteed, parents should soon intervene if necessary, in a positive direction. In this case, they act as “fixers” to ensure that their children don’t miss out on great life opportunities, even in the absence of resources.
Parents can live in difficult circumstances, but if they see an opportunity that is judged necessary for their child’s success in school or in life, they are willing to sacrifice much for their child. get it.
Fourth, they are also the revealers
To be a “revealer”, parents need to show their children the wonders of the world. So even when children grow up in poverty, they can still open their eyes through visiting museums, spending time at the library and meeting people around.
Philosophers accompanying the child’s development will be of great help to the process of discovering the interest in learning. Because they will help children find the purpose of learning, as well as the importance of knowledge.
If a 3-year-old asks insightful questions, philosopher parents won’t ignore the question. Instead, they try to answer in a way that enhances the child’s understanding of life.
The sixth role, the role model the child wants to follow
Children often learn more from what they observe (especially from experiences in their parents’ lives) than from what parents teach them. Parents themselves should also take time for themselves to learn and develop themselves. When your glass of water is not full, how can you share it with others? When you have no value, how can you give value to others?
Saturday, the negotiators
Parents should teach children how to respect, and also how to act on their own. Children need guidance on how to protect their own interests and deal with those who may affect their interests.
Last role, let’s make a GPS
Don’t forget to become a GPS to help your child navigate. The voice of the parent in the child’s head will be useful advice when the child begins to leave the house, guiding the child through new situations in life. However, limit yourself to the threshold of “direction”, without forcing.
What happens when parents fail in these roles?
According to Ronald Ferguson, parents not being able to fulfill the above important roles can lead to big problems.
For example, if the parent is not an early learning partner, the child will start kindergarten with a distaste for learning. If the “fixer” doesn’t do their job, it’s likely that the child will miss out on the opportunity to acquire some important skills along the way. Without the philosopher, the child may not find the purpose of learning. Without role models or negotiators, children may withdraw in the face of powerful adversaries, rather than act on their own.
There are also children who do not get all of the above and still succeed, but their journey will be much more difficult. With the right support from parents, children will make important strides from an early age.
*Source: The Harvard Gazette
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